Here’s to successful bipolar disorder management in 2011. That is definitely my goal. I always say to myself- changes have to be made in order for me to move forward. I have my list of changes ready- they are reasonable and doable. It’s great to hear from others who are making bipolar disorder management a priority. Mary writes below of how important it is to know our own behavior so that we can tell the difference between the bipolar behavior and our own. Thanks to Mary for the positive message!
Julie –
Thank you! Your truisms are in my journal, along with my own.
I was diagnosed with bipolar 2 December 14, 2010. I found your book “Take Charge of Bipolar Disorder 2 and this site. Both are helping me understand what I thought was “just” Major Depression, and me, is much more than that. Now I know that all of my feelings of wanting to run away from my family and (actually) disguarding friends are actually symptoms and not just because I’m a “bad” person.
Thank you again for your guidance in leading me to a road towards healthier living. I’m so sorry you are having a bout of depression. I hope you head toward “even” soon.
What are your plans for tomorrow night? I hope that you can be with people, have fun and know that you are important to the world. I certainly want that for myself. Depression doesn’t want that for me – so I have come up with 2011 trusims that I am going to repeat to myself for the next few weeks- because of the pressures of the new year- because I turn 47 in a week and because I want 2011 to be better than any other year of my life.
1. Dates don’t matter. 2010 and 2011 are the same thing. We just label them differently.
2. Age doesn’t matter. I am the age I am. Nothing will ever change that.
3. What happened last year is done- either positive or negative- fantastic or terrible. It’s done.
4. Life can always get better. Life can be good.
5. The things that bipolar says to me are not true. I can’t trust them and I have to always remember who I am on the inside and go from there.
6. I am loved by many people.
7. 2011 is a new opportunity to manage this illness more effectively and reach more goals and dreams.
My brain wants to reject this even as I write it! Depressoin can take every one of the above statments and make them UN truisms. I can’t listen. I’m going to put this list in my journal and read it when times are tough.
What about you? Please don’t be hard on yourself for what happened in 2010. Let’s be kind to ourselves and look at what we have accomplished.
Julie powers all of New York with her bipolar tears!
These are the signs I’m in a situation that’s bad for my bipolar:
1. Trouble sleeping. I actually always have trouble sleeping, but in these situations I can’t sleep at all without sleep meds.
2. Crying and crying and crying. The waterfall I wrote about before. Crying a river. My eyes are all red today from crying all day yesterday. It’s not that I want to cry- and it’s not that the situation even warrants that much crying- it’s just what my depression does in stressful situations.
3. Feel hopeless and trapped. My brain starts to say terrible things about my past and my future and then I feel I have to get out of my present situation and just run away. I used to do that!
I’m in Michigan visiting my dad. The trip has been tough in many ways. I knew yesterday that making decisions during a waterfall session is not a good idea- so I very smartly called my therapist Robin. Her advice was so hard to do, but I did it and the issue is resolved. She said, “Be honest with your family. There is no other way. I think they will understand. If you want to leave early, then leave early. But not until you discuss things. You can’t assume things are as you see them. Depression really clouds your reality.”
It’s incredibly hard for me to tell people that my bipolar is taking over and I have to take care of the bipolar before I can do anything else. But if I don’t deal with the problem that is triggering the bipolar, there really is no way out!
I’m telling you today. There is a way out by telling people how you feel, listening to their responses and then working on a plan together. Of course it’s not always possible, but you always must try. Julie
There are many kinds of depression. (There are also many kinds of mania!) I categorize my depression in two ways: negative or weepy. This is pretty simple. I often get mad, irritated, anxious and worried when I get depressed, but more often I get weepy. Of course there are other types of depression, silent depression for example where a person just stays in bed all day. But today I’m experiencing weepy depression and I hate it sdo much.
Bipolar is chemical- so it’s natural it would also control our physical actions in certain ways. If I get depressed and can’t stop crying, it’s just the kind of depression I’m experiencing. I have friends with bipolar who never cry. They just get angry! And sometimes mean!! I can be like that as well, though I don’t take it out on others like I used to. My challenge these days is to not take it out on myself.
Bipolar is a complicated illness. It’s important to remember that it is an illness. If you find yourself in a stressful situation, make sure you separate your bipolar reaction from your ‘real self’ reaction. That is how you can keep from making rash decisions that will make you really upset when the mood swing stops! Right now, I am in Michigan visiting my dad. It’s a new environment and I’m having a tough time simply becuase I’m depressed. Nothing else is wrong. I know this because on the days I’m not depressed, I don’t cry a waterfall of tears. That’s just depression!
If you are in a new situation right now and are having a tough time, it helps to write down what is happening so that you can distinguish between the bipolar you and the non bipolar you. This is how the Health Cards work. I’ve used them for 15 years, but I still have to watch myself for symptoms! My goal is a happy and stable life. It’s a daily goal! julie
Julie, I was wondering..why did it take me 35 years for drs to see I have bipolar type 2..I have been on meds for a week and it feels like I am getting worse. I am back in a deep depression..don’t want to be around anyone other than my son who is one..I am afraid..what can I do where can I go other than my drs to get help..I am scared n feel lost. Jennifer
Hi Jennifer. I know how you feel. It took a very long time for me to finally get a bipolar II diagnosis. It’s really easy for hypomania to be missed- people with bipolar I have full blown mania- and that is never missed! But for us, it can always be seen as depression only. Especially if you are someone like myself who basically picked up and traveled when I got manic. So no one really saw me manic more than once.
It can take a long time for meds to work when you first get diagnosed, but they should not make the depression worse. It may mean that it’s the course of your depression and the medications need time to work. This is common and it’s often hard to wait it out, but that is usually what happens. If you are in a deep depression that is suicidal- it’s an easy answer. You must call your health care professional immediately and say what is going on. A new medication can cause depression to worsen depending on the medication- this is not common, but you always have to be careful. If you’re on a anti depressant and you feel suicidal, you must tell your doctor as anti depressants can exacerbate bipolar symptoms in those with bipolar. I want to note that this is RARE, but you have to be careful. Also, if you have bipolar disorder and are only on an anti depressant, this is not the correct treatment of bipolar disorder as it can cause mania. Your health care professional should know about this.
What matters is that YOU know what meds you’re on and why. Then you can ask questions. Thus, if you are in a deep depression, are not sure why it took so long for you to be diagnosed and are not sure how long it normally takes for your particular medications to work, I suggest you call your health care professional tomorrow and say you need to ask some questions. I have found that health care professionals are very helpful when you’re depressed. So please don’t let time go by when you need help! I know you want to help yourself and not only depend on medicine, but you must get your questions answered to make sure you’re getting the right medical attention. Please note that I am not a doctor- but I work with doctors who have verified all of the information I use in my books and on this blog- but do make sure you get advice from medication professionals as well.
I am so glad you wrote because it means you are getting help for yourself. I was so scared when I was dianosed 15 years ago. I thought- what is bipolar II? Why did it take so long for me to find out what was wrong? Now I know it’s common. So you are not alone. I am SO glad you are getting help and learning more about yourself. Your wonderful son will want a stable mom- so get the help you need. He will be so proud of you when he is old enough to understand. It can be hard to do this when you’re depressed. My book Get it Done When You’re Depressed can help right now. One of the tips is to talk to yourself like a drill sargeant. Maybe you can imagine me writing at my dad’s house where I am visiting in Michigan. I am saying- “Jennifer. It’s wonderful that you are getting help and taking medications. It can take a while for them to work. Please call your health care professional tomorrow and get the help you need. I believe in you!”
If you are unsure about the bipolar diagnosis, my book Take Charge of Bipolar Disorder is a good first book to read. It helps family members as well.
You can get better and your depression can be treated successful. It just takes time. Good for you for taking care of yourself.
My coauthor Dr. John Preston and I are writing a new chapter to be added to our book Loving Someone with Bipolar Disorder. It’s on the topic of medications as I didn’t cover it in depth in the first edition of the book. I spent more time on medications in Take Charge of Bipolar Disorder.
I really could use your help with this new chapter in two ways. I need to hear some medication success stories from partners of people with bipolar.
How do medications help your partner and your relationship?
Then, I need people to finish this sentence:
I’m thankful for my medications because…….
I have plenty of stories in the chapter about the difficulties of taking bipolar illness medications, but I want some positive as well!
I will start….
I am thankful for my Lamictal because it takes the edge off all of my symptoms. It helps with rapid cycling, hypomania and depression and definitely helps with my mild psychosis. It helps me be a less irritated person and I’m far, far more resilient when I’m on the medication. It doesn’ t make me gain weight. I can deal with the breathing side effects and it saves my life! It’s the partner I need for my management plan.
Thank you Lamictal! (now, don’t ask me to say that about some of the other drugs I’ve tried- but I do want to always remember how Lamictal has changed my life for the better!)
I look foward to your answers:
How have medications helped my partner and our relationship…
I am thankful for my medications because……
Thanks! You can post your answer by clicking on the comments button below. Julie
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Mom Brain Podcast
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The health information contained herein is provided for general education purposes only. This site should not be seen as a substitute for an official diagnosis or for professional health care.
