Straight Talk on Managing Bipolar Disorder

More on Jared Lee Loughner and Mental Illness

I posted the blog entry below on the Jared Lee Loughner Shootings in Arizona earlier yesterday morning. ( I suggest you read that posting first.) I can’t believe the response. I’ve received hundreds of comments from people who said they were feeling the same way and there must be something we can do to bring light to the mental illness part of this situation. I’d like to say something up front- what Jared did is terrible- and terrible is too light of a word in this situation. But, he is ill. He could be one of us or someone we love. I work with many families in my coaching business where the children do unsafe and life threatening behaviors. I am not saying they are dangerous like Jared Loughner, but there is a part of this in everyone with paranoid psychsos.

When my former parnter Ivan was in the hospital in a massive manic/psychotic episode, I used to look at him and think, “Who is this person? It doesn’t look like him. His eyes are wild. He suspects I’ve done something wrong. He won’t eat the food in case it is poisoned. He doesn’t trust the staff and he believes someone is trying to shoot me. I often said he looked like a wild animal. No matter what you feel on this topic, there is no doubt that we have to make sure that the brain disorder side of the issues is discuessed just as much as his terrible behavior. There can be two sides to any situation. Talking about his brain doesn’t mean it makes what he did any less awful, it just opens a dialogue for the people of the US to understand at least a part of why this might have happened.

As parents, partners, brothers, sisters, grandparents, teachers, health care professionals and those in the media, we MUST see both sides and report things honestly. Please speak out in any way you can- we are NOT making excuses. Nothing excuses what he did- especially for the loved ones- but we can possibly shine some light on how his brain was thinking.

Here is my hope: I know the country is behind the victims of Jared’s terrible crime. I am too. I can’t imagine losing a loved one in that way. But my fervent hope is that Jared and his family be treated with compassion and understanding regarding his illness. Justice will be done for the crime victims- let’s hope that justice for a very mentally ill man can be done as well.

Look at these pictures and tell me what you think. This is Jared when younger and then his mug shot from this week.

Jared Lee Loughner and the Arizona Shootings

Here in the states, a man named Jared Lee Loughner opened fire
at a super market where a politician U.S. Rep. Gabrielle Giffords
was giving a speech. She was definitely his target. There is a
lot of coverage on the news here about his behavior as well as
when he was in high school and once he graduated people were very
concerned about his behavior. The first article I read mentioned
his background and how he had left a note for the senator saying
what he was going to do.

Then the article said every single thing except what was glaringly
obvious. Jared Laughtner had a severe mental illness that impaired
his judgement and led to this terrible event. As I was reading the
articles, I said to myself: “Are these writers blind? Don’t they
know anything? He is 100% showing all of the signs of paranoid
schizophrenia. All of the signs from paranoia, inability to get
along with others, trouble with the reality around him to odd
writings and behavior. The list is endless. I kept reading the
article waiting for the word schizophrenia to be mentioned and
there was not one reference to a possible brain disorder.

Of course, things are different this morning. People can’t stay
blind forever. Now the articles have these headlines:

Jared Lee Loughner a ‘Disturbed’ Man

Jared Lee Loughner and His Legacy of Despair

The Lunatic’s Veto (Thank you New York Post!)

and now there is a label: The Tuscon Safeway Shooter

Legacy of despair? How much longer is our society going to skirt
around the issue and use these words instead of saying the real words:

Mental Illness- Schizophrenia- Bipolar Disorder. The real words.
As those of us with the illnesses or those of us who care about
someone with a mental illness, need to speak out and say, “This was a
man with a brain disorder, a mental illness that distorted the reality
of his mind. Yes, the shootings are his fault. But not in the way the
media portrays the situation. He obviously did not get the care he needed-
and that is the real tragedy. When I saw his picture I was so shocked.
As is so common, he looks like a sweet and normal guy. The problem is
that whatever illness he has, and I’m pretty sure paranoid schizophrenia
will come out soon- he is a human being who did something so terrible
it’s hard to imagine. He killed and injured people as do many who are
not of sound mind and body. My heart goes out the families and
to U.S. Rep. Gabrielle Giffords.

But… for once.. can we just talk about this for what it is? An
illness that was not caught and treated? We would never treat cancer in this way-even if someone committed such a terrible crime. Can we use this to discuss mental illness instead of finding a reason WHY this happened? It happened
because he was ill and even though people tried, he didn’t get the right treatment.

Julie

Here are the comments I have received since posting this blog:

Thank you for writing this, Julie. I hope you will get it published elsewhere: this is a message that needs to get out into the world.

I totally agree! My mentally ill ex once went to a political rally with a knife — because he was paranoid schizophrenic. Fortunately he turned around and went home when he couldn’t find a parking spot. It’s an illness, and we should be talking about that.

I’ve been thinking the very same thing, Julie. How right you are that a mental illness such a paranoid schizophrenia is treatable and that, sadly, this is a tragedy that could have been prevented had this young man received proper help. The signs were all there. My only hope at this point is that these events lead our health care system to a better place in terms of educating the public, identifying brain disorders early on and providing treatment to all connected with the issue.

Thanks for your blog!

RIGHT ON!

So many well put points. The key is having access to first a diagnoses, then treatment, then sticking to the treatment plan and medications forever.

This last part can be so difficult, but when someone with a mental illness–as Jared Lee obviously has–does something so horrific, it hopefully reminds us all to keep our wellness plans at the top of our priority list.

I could not agree more, Julie. Because symptoms are behavioral and mental instead of physical mental illness is still stigmatised in this society.
For a lot of complicated reasons mental illness is not dealt with in effective ways most of the time

U r soooooooo right julie! Why aren’t we using the money & energy into treating mental illness

EXCELLENT point, Julie. The same thoughts occurred to me. Thanks for voicing them!

I couldn’t agree with you more! I believe one of the problem’s is people think you’re trying to make excuses for folks suffering from these illnesses……but that’s not the case. Just like you said “the shooting are his fault”, but we can’t overlook the facts. Knowing everything I know now (which does not compare to your knowledge), the times I’ve brought things up to the family about Kyle’s illness….they response I get is “oh, here it comes….making excuses for his behavior again”…..NO, not excuses…..I’m just trying to get them to understand his mental illness!

Keep up the good work Julie…..you have many supporters!

Tips to Help You Keep Going When it Feels Impossible

It’s really, really tough to have bipolar depression. When I get down and feel that I will never get better, I constantly remind myself of the following:

1. Depression is a symptom of bipolar disorder. There is no way that life is as awful as depression makes it seem.
2. The more I know about how I am when I’m not depressed, the more I can recognize depression for what it is.
3. It’s never a good idea to make big changes when you’re depressed. It’s ok to think about them and write them down, but it’s so important to wait until you’re better to change your life. (My book Bipolar Happens! talks about this. I used to just pick up and move when the mood swings were raging!)
4. Depression tells you that no one loves you. If this feeling only comes up when you’re depressed, it’s not real. Don’t act on it. Wait for the depression to get better and then evaluate your relationships.
5. Depression can get better. It takes a plan and medications for most of us, but change is possible.

Oh wow, it’s hard to keep life in perspective when you’re depressed. My entire life is about keeping perspective during mood swings and preventing mood swings in every way I can.

Can you tell that today is a tough day? I will keep going- use the ideas in my books and make sure the depression is better by tonight. You can do the same. I promise! Julie

It’s My Birthday Today! 47

I’m 47 years old today. I have to admit I’m not much of a birthday fan. I find them stressful as I have a party and always think no one will show up. Is that bipolar or what!!! Of course, people do show up and we have fun. I just do happy hour and then karaoke. Turning 47 is hard. It says to me- one more year gone by of depression Julie! One more year of rapid cycling! One more year! And then I say to myself, “What @#$@#$ Julie. That is ridiculous. Depression wants you to focus on age. Life wants you to focus on friends, self improvement, bipolar mangements, work and life in general. How good are you as a person Julie? Do you hurt people? Do you let your bipolar wreck your relationships like you used to? No, no, no! So what if I’m 47. It’s great I have made it this far. People with bipolar disorder know exactly what I mean. So good for me! Happy birthday to me. I want to be positive no matter what my mood.

When is your birthday? Please do celebrate it as another year of being able to learn more about bipolar disorder!

Though I have to admit I often hear the first line of a Rolling Stones song in my head when I think of getting older. Haha!

Depression in the Workplace: Call for submissions from Esperanza Magazine

I write a column for BP Magazine (Bipolar Magazine). I love this work and love the magazine. If you don’t have a subscription, it’s so worth it for those with bipolar, family members, partners and health care professionals. And of course you can read my column!

BP Magazine has a sister magazine that focuses on Depression. It also is a superb magazine that talks with many high profile people about depression and how it affects their lives as well as those who face depression daily while not in the spotlight. Esperanza is asking for your ideas on how you deal with depression in the workplace. All of us with bipolar illness have plenty of depression, so I know that your ideas will be valuable. Here is the link for the submission:

Esperanza Magazine Survey

I know your information can help a lot of people. Work and depression are not a good combo!

Julie

Here is the link to read more about bipolar magazine. This will take you to the magazine blog and you can then find more information on the subscription. This magazine really is helpful for family members.

BP Magazine

Is bipolar disorder illness really REAL? I ask myself this all of the time.

I was diagnosed with ultra rapid cycling bipolar II with psychotic features in 1995. Now there is a diagnosis! I had my first hypomanic episode in 1980. So I have been living with bipolar disorder for all of my adult life. I’m 47 now. You would think that I would be used to it. I’m not. It always shocks me when I get really sick. The mood swings are just so odd. They can be so random and simply stupid- I can get psychotic just because someone is rude to me in public? That is crazy! I have an argument with my brother and I get in my car and cry so hard I can’t drive? I go out and have fun and meet someone attractive and I get OCD so badly I never call the person again?

How about the depression that comes from change? It can even be good change such as getting a book deal. Or how about the hypomania that starts simply because the sun comes out?

It’s hard to get used to this. I’ve done all that I can possibly do to manage this illness. It’s all in my books- It’s all written down in my Health Cards. I’m the expert! But bipolar could care less and it treats me just the same as if I were just diagnosed. I accept the diagnosis because I have no choice- but getting used to it has not been so easy! I’m so thankful I have a treatment plan that works or life would be really hard. I hope it helps to know that you’re not alone if you find this illness incredibly confusing. It simply is confusing.

Julie