Straight Talk on Managing Bipolar Disorder

Bipolar Disorder Medication Blog Posts

All of my blogs are divided into categories- you can see the list on the right- I’ve been consolidating them for the past few weeks. Here’s an example of what’s included in the medications category:

Medications: Abilify, tegretol, depakote, lithium, lamictal, lamotrigine, zyprexa, serequel, anti depressants, medical treatment of bipolar disorder, medications used to treat bipolar disorder, side effects, anti convulsants, anti psychotics, mood stabilizers, mania medications, depression medications, anxiety medications, talking with your doctor about medications, family members on medications, family members who refuse medications, medications in the news, what medications should a person with bipolar disorder take, etc etc!

Can you believe there is so much to learn about medications and bipolar disorder! If you just take an hour to read all of the blogs in this category, you will know more than most people on the planet about the drugs used to treat the illness. It’s fascinating information. I have learned it slowly- it’s the best way to take it all in.

Just one hour and you’re on your way to bipolar medication expertise!

Julie

A letter from a partner of a person with bipolar disorder

Dearest Partner,

Here is what I need from you in our relationship:

1. TAKE YOUR MEDS.

2. Do the basics in order to stay stable. There are many things in your control that are easy to do.

3. Learn what your own bipolar disorder looks like and sounds like. You can then take care of yourself first and I can then help.

4. Think before you speak- yes, you can do this even when you are manic. Read about the Bipolar Conversation in Take Charge of Bipolar Disorder. We can read this book together.

5. Understand what it is like for me on the outside looking in. I have a very different experience of bipolar disorder than you do.

6. Let me in on your treatment including health care visits and medication changes.

7. Think of ME. I am not a therapist, doctor, punching bag, caretaker or parent. I need and expect an equal relationship where we work together to manage the illness and keep our relationship loving and strong.

8. Always remember that I love you and that your health means everything to me.

Thank you,

Your Loving Partner

Loving Someone with Bipolar Disorder: Understanding and Helping Your Partner

I remember driving home from the hospital after seeing my partner Ivan in the psych ward. I was sobbing in fear and hopelessness. It was 1994 and Ivan had just been diagnosed with bipolar disorder. I didn’t even know what it meant.

I had never heard of the illness. Was it curable? Was he faking?

The staff in the hospital were often wonderful, but I could tell they had ZERO idea of what I was going through. I had so many fears- I couldn’t sleep. I didn’t know if he was going to die. I couldn’t work.

Does bipolar disorder last forever? How long would he be in the hospital?

What is psychosis? What is mania? Why is he saying such crazy things? Doesn’t he love me anymore? I went through this for months. There were only a few books on the market about the illness and there was nothing for a partner. I was alone and his only advocate.

Ivan was in the hosptial for two months. I met his doctor once in the elevator.

When it was finally time for Ivan to come home, I wasn’t given any advice. No one told me that I should watch out for suicidal behavior or what to do if he got sick again. It was all up to me.

I remember sitting in an office with his nurse practitioner a few weeks later. Ivan was a zombie from all of the medications. His hands shook so badly he couldn’t write. He was miserable and I was miserable and scared. I said to the nurse practitioner, “I’m not sure what to do. Ivan seems so sluggish. He can’t work and he is so unhappy. I don’t know what to do!” Here is the reply I received:

“Don’t you think you’re getting a bit too involved in all of this Julie?”

At that moment I said- enough of this terrible health care. I am taking over. Ivan and I had a tough, tough time, but we worked together and he got better. I remember thinking: If we make it through this, and we will, I am going to write a book so that a partner of someone with bipolar disorder will NEVER have to go through what I went through.

Seven years later, I wrote the book.

I wrote Loving Someone with Bipolar Disorder: Understanding and Helping Your Partner for everyone who is in a relationship with someone who has bipolar disorder. I know it can help you create a loving and positive relationship with your partner.

You can 100% work together to manage this illness.

All of the steps you need are in the book.

Happiness is possible.

Julie

PS: I am very happy to say that bipolar disorder health care has improved since Ivan was so ill. There is more contact with health care professionals in the hospital and they definitely understand more about what partners go through. But if your partner is ill, you will have to advocate for what YOU need.

You matter too!

A Special Sight at Karaoke

I am at my favorite karaoke bar in Portland, Oregon. A man completely dressed as a Klingon from Start Trek just sang Bon Jovi’s song Dead or Alive in the KLINGON language.

Only in Portland!

Julie

Get comfortable with uncomfortable bipolar disorder thoughts!

OMG. My brain says the most ridiculous things- things I would NEVER say on my own. It creates relationships that aren’t there- goes over conversations that never happened and then makes me feel like it’s all true. It has taken me years to realize that I can deny these thoughts- yell at these thoughts and beg them to go away- sometimes this works, sometimes is doesn’t. It’s very hard to live with a constant conversation in your head.

I’ve worked on this for 13 years, so I guess it’s a never ending battle! It’s defintely better. The most important thing is that I don’t act out on these thoughts like I used to. This has saved my relationships- especially with the new people that come into my life. Watching my triggers diligently has made the biggest difference. I feel like a monk though. These days I’m learning to just let these thoughts roam around in my head and laugh at them when I can. Haha. My brain just said WHAT?

Julie

Newsletter: Bipolar Disorder and Paranoid Delusions

Parnoia is a type of psychosis called a delusion. A delusion is a false belief.

For example, paranoia can be the belief that you have done something wrong and that a person or an organization is upset with you. This is a scary delusion as it feels so real.

Paranoia used to really cause me a lot of trouble. I have worked hard so that I can at least recognize it before it makes me do something stupid.

I often get the feeling that my friends are ignoring me and that they have met friends they like a lot better than myself. It’s a terrible feeling. Luckily, I know the signs of paranoia and I don’t act on them, instead I call my friends and ask them to do something. When they say yes, I know that all is fine. My friends are the type who will tell me if something is wrong- so my paranoia is almost always rooted in bipolar and not reality.

Paranoid feelings are FALSE. Worry based on at least some fact is real.

Paranoia does not stand up to factual questioning- but for the person in the paranoid episode, it feels more real than anything they have ever experienced. It’s important to remember than it feels real for them. If you try to talk a paranoid person out of their beliefs, it won’t work.

Here are some examples of paranoia. Have you seen these in yourself or your loved ones?

1.Beleiving that someone is standing across the street staring at you through your apartment window, but when you look outside, there is nothing there.

2. Feeling with great certainty that your coworkers have a plan to get you fired. You know this becuase when they are in a group and walk up to them, they all sccatter in different directions without saying hi.

3. Once, when my former partner Ivan was in the hosptial, he was very, very paranoid. I went in one day to say hello and he looked at me and said, “Why is your face so red? Have you been doing something wrong that you aren’t telling me?” True paranoia. He told me later that he really believed it.

When you are well, these thoughts never even come up. You know there is no one outside and you know for sure that your colleagues like you. They simply go back to their desks when they finish a conversation.

The dangerous this about paranoia is acting on it. Calling the cops for a man who isn’t there or confronting coworkers for talking behind your back.

Question: What is the best treatment for paranoia? Anti psychotics and a management plan such as the Health Cards to make sure the paranoid symptoms are caught early so they don’t move into destructive behavior. This is what I have done, so it’s possible!

Julie

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