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When I\u2019m in an abandonment downswing, I think, \u201cI am a worthless ant, a speck of dirt on this huge revolving planet. I\u2019m completely alone!\u201d<\/em> The idea that I\u2019m the last person on earth and no one loves me is a typical depression symptom. It\u2019s not personal, and it\u2019s not true. It\u2019s a sign that I\u2019m depressed.<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n Did you know it\u2019s normal to feel abandoned when you have bipolar depression? Just like it\u2019s normal to feel shaky if you have diabetes and your insulin is low. We have an illness, not a personal problem.<\/p>\n The good news is that symptoms can be managed. There is nothing wrong with your life when you feel abandoned while depressed; there is something in your brain that needs to be treated. When you manage your depression, the feelings of abandonment can go away. Honest.<\/p>\n See how this cascades<\/em>? It can be especially tough at night when I try to sleep or I wake up too early and can\u2019t get back to sleep<\/a>.<\/p>\n If you love someone with bipolar disorder who gets these abandonment symptoms when depressed, what can you say? Here is a script to get you started:<\/p>\n I hear that you feel lonely and that no one wants to be with you. I have heard this in the past when you\u2019re depressed. I looked at the actual events around you and realized that you are not able to answer your phone or say yes to things because your brain is off track. Let\u2019s talk about your depression and get you back into the life you care about; I know your feelings of being alone in this world will lift as well. They are a symptom of this rotten illness. How do I know this? Because I\u2019m standing next to you and I\u2019m not going anywhere, no matter what.<\/em><\/p>\n I asked Martin Baker\u2014the coauthor along with Fran Houston (who has bipolar disorder) of the book High Tide, Low Tide: A Caring Friend\u2019s Guide to Bipolar Disorder <\/em><\/a>\u2014how a friend can help someone thorough an abandonment episode: \u201cJulie, I recognize the internal dialogues you\u2019ve listed (\u2018No one is calling,\u2019 etc); I have heard them from Fran many times. My response is not to bombard her with contradictory assertions: \u2018Of course they like you!\u2019 \u2018You are imagining it\u2019 \u2018There\u2019s nothing wrong with you\u2014you are a fun, lovely person; anyone would be proud to be your friend!\u2019 That kind of talking doesn\u2019t honor what Fran is actually feeling. A better response is to simply be there<\/em>. Be the person who does<\/em> call. Be the person who isn\u2019t<\/em> too busy. Be the person who demonstrates<\/em> (not merely says<\/em>) that you are likable, and liked.\u201d<\/p>\n What about you? Having a plan in place to counteract these feelings of abandonment is my best advice for maintaining relationships when you have bipolar depression. I have learned to recognize my abandonment symptoms. My first rule for getting through an abandonment episode is not hiding in my bedroom. And I force myself to pick up the phone when it rings, or answer that email from a friend. It is so hard, but it works. You can do it!<\/p>\n – This article was original publishing in Bp Magazine.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" When I\u2019m in an abandonment downswing, I think, \u201cI am a worthless ant, a speck of dirt on this huge revolving planet. I\u2019m completely alone!\u201d The idea that I\u2019m the last person on earth and no one loves me is a typical depression symptom. It\u2019s not personal, and it\u2019s not true. It\u2019s a sign that I\u2019m depressed.<\/p>\n Three signs of abandonment depression You do have people who want to help, but you ignore their words and actions. You feel like even pets<\/a> don\u2019t want your company. The abandonment feeling encompasses home, work, and the world in general. You feel that EVERYONE and EVERYTHING is leaving you. The abandonment feelings are not attached to an event. Events (triggers) can exacerbate your feelings of abandonment, but you will NOT [ Read More ]<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":13401,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_links_to":"","_links_to_target":""},"categories":[4],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.bipolarhappens.com\/bhblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/13400"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.bipolarhappens.com\/bhblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.bipolarhappens.com\/bhblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.bipolarhappens.com\/bhblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.bipolarhappens.com\/bhblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=13400"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/www.bipolarhappens.com\/bhblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/13400\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":13402,"href":"https:\/\/www.bipolarhappens.com\/bhblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/13400\/revisions\/13402"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.bipolarhappens.com\/bhblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/13401"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.bipolarhappens.com\/bhblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=13400"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.bipolarhappens.com\/bhblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=13400"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.bipolarhappens.com\/bhblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=13400"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}Three signs of abandonment depression<\/h3>\n
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Here are my typical abandonment depression thoughts:<\/h3>\n
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Julie\u00a0<\/strong><\/em><\/span><\/h1>\n
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