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I know the feeling. I’ve lived with suicidal depression for all of my adult life. Here is the story of how I live with my suicidal thoughts that come from bipolar depression.\u00a0 This article was originally published in Bp Magazine. The magazine website is a great resource on the tough days.<\/em> <\/span><\/p>\n When bipolar depression symptoms are overwhelming, finding the strength to do even a small task can help you make it through the awful days.<\/p>\n by Julie A. Fast<\/em><\/p>\n I often have days when the bipolar is so intense, I feel I\u2019m going to spontaneously combust. This is when the illness is as physical as it is mental. I am either stuck to a chair eating ice cream or I think about getting drunk in order to feel better. Before I was diagnosed and learned to manage this illness, I ate the ice cream and drank unil I passed out.<\/p>\n Learning to manage bipolar successfully doesn\u2019t mean that I don\u2019t get sick. It means that I at least recognize the mood swing for what it is and know that the ice cream and booze are not an actual solution to my mood swing pain.<\/p>\n Instead, I have taught myself to talk to the real me when I get sick so that I can salvage my day and still have a life despite having a serious mental illness. I\u2019m not going to lie to you about bipolar disorder. It doesn\u2019t serve any of us to hear statements such as: \u201cIt gets better!\u201d or \u201cYou can survive!\u201d without also explaining what it takes for this to happen.<\/p>\n If you\u2019re reading this right now and your illness is raging\u2026..and you feel like you can\u2019t do anything about it, you\u2019re not alone. I\u2019m feeling this as I write.<\/p>\n And just like me, you can learn to live through these awful days when the bipolar makes you want to rip off your skin and run screaming down the street just to at least FEEL something.<\/p>\n I was diagnosed with bipolar disorder in 1995 at age 31.\u00a0 It helped to know what was going on, but took years for me to stop the black out drunks, the manic sex that made me feel AWFUL and the lost days of not getting out of bed.<\/p>\n I still get sick a lot. Medications have never taken away all of my symptoms. They rarely do. They help and believe me, I take my meds, but management is up to me and it\u2019s a daily process.<\/p>\n Right now, it\u2019s sunny and warm. I\u2019m sitting outside at a cafe writing this blog. It took me HOURS to get out of my room. I was STUCK in a mood swing. It\u2019s OK. That is my illness. I remind myself that if I didn\u2019t have bipolar, I wouldn\u2019t get sick this way.<\/p>\n Please expect to get sick when you have bipolar and have a plan in place like the one in Get it Done When You\u2019re Depressed<\/a>\u00a0or the WRAP program<\/a> or anything that you will actually use. This webpage is filled with excellent advice from people who have the illness.<\/p>\n I am a happy person. Bipolar is an illness that often makes me feel like I can\u2019t go on. I don\u2019t trust this feeling. I can go on. I wrote this blog.<\/p>\n I know the feeling. I’ve lived with suicidal depression for all of my adult life. Here is the story of how I live with my suicidal thoughts that come from bipolar depression. This article was originally published in Bp Magazine. The magazine website is a great resource on the tough days. <\/p>\n So Sick with Bipolar You Feel You Can\u2019t Go On? <\/p>\n When bipolar depression symptoms are overwhelming, finding the strength to do even a small task can help you make it through the awful days.<\/p>\n by Julie A. Fast<\/p>\n I often have days when the bipolar is so intense, I feel I\u2019m going to spontaneously combust. This is when the illness is as physical as it is mental. I am either stuck to a chair eating ice cream or [ Read More ]<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":12711,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_links_to":"","_links_to_target":""},"categories":[],"tags":[3241],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.bipolarhappens.com\/bhblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/12940"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.bipolarhappens.com\/bhblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.bipolarhappens.com\/bhblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.bipolarhappens.com\/bhblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.bipolarhappens.com\/bhblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=12940"}],"version-history":[{"count":4,"href":"https:\/\/www.bipolarhappens.com\/bhblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/12940\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":12962,"href":"https:\/\/www.bipolarhappens.com\/bhblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/12940\/revisions\/12962"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.bipolarhappens.com\/bhblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/12711"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.bipolarhappens.com\/bhblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=12940"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.bipolarhappens.com\/bhblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=12940"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.bipolarhappens.com\/bhblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=12940"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}So Sick with Bipolar You Feel You Can\u2019t Go On?<\/strong><\/em><\/h2>\n
Julie<\/span><\/strong><\/em><\/h1>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
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