{"id":12578,"date":"2018-11-05T13:05:35","date_gmt":"2018-11-05T21:05:35","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.bipolarhappens.com\/bhblog\/?p=12578"},"modified":"2018-11-05T13:05:35","modified_gmt":"2018-11-05T21:05:35","slug":"fast-conversation-strategies-what-to-say-when-a-person-is-trying-to-control-you","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.bipolarhappens.com\/bhblog\/fast-conversation-strategies-what-to-say-when-a-person-is-trying-to-control-you\/","title":{"rendered":"Fast Conversation Strategies: What to Say When a Person is Trying to Control You"},"content":{"rendered":"<div id=\"attachment_12323\" style=\"width: 268px\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\"><img aria-describedby=\"caption-attachment-12323\" loading=\"lazy\" class=\"size-medium wp-image-12323\" src=\"https:\/\/www.bipolarhappens.com\/bhblog\/wp-content\/uploads\/30-unbelievable-animal-photos-you-wont-forget-13-258x300.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"258\" height=\"300\" srcset=\"https:\/\/www.bipolarhappens.com\/bhblog\/wp-content\/uploads\/30-unbelievable-animal-photos-you-wont-forget-13-258x300.jpg 258w, https:\/\/www.bipolarhappens.com\/bhblog\/wp-content\/uploads\/30-unbelievable-animal-photos-you-wont-forget-13-129x150.jpg 129w, https:\/\/www.bipolarhappens.com\/bhblog\/wp-content\/uploads\/30-unbelievable-animal-photos-you-wont-forget-13-400x465.jpg 400w, https:\/\/www.bipolarhappens.com\/bhblog\/wp-content\/uploads\/30-unbelievable-animal-photos-you-wont-forget-13.jpg 728w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 258px) 100vw, 258px\" \/><p id=\"caption-attachment-12323\" class=\"wp-caption-text\">I choose the stable life&#8230;.<\/p><\/div>\n<p>Strategies from my parent and partner coaching&#8230;.<\/p>\n<p>When you ask a question or talk about the other person and their answer is about you, learn how to get the conversation back on track by using my Fast Conversation Strategies.<\/p>\n<p>&#8211; I like spending time together, but lately I\u2019ve found it hard to get in touch with you.<br \/>\n&#8211; Response: Oh, so now you\u2019re my mother?<\/p>\n<p>&#8211; It helps me a lot to know when you need me to do the writing on the website. I need a schedule so that I can keep my work in order. I&#8217;m a bit confused about the project itself.<br \/>\n&#8211; Hmm. I guess it\u2019s all about you these days is it? Can&#8217;t you just do what I sent you and let me get my own work done!<\/p>\n<p>I\u2019m worried about your drinking and would like to talk about it.<br \/>\n&#8211; You had a glass of wine at dinner the other night, so look who\u2019s talking!<\/p>\n<p>This is all bull@#$@# if you want to know the truth and as soon as you realize that someone is deflecting your genuine worry or desire for information back on you, you can stop it in five seconds.<\/p>\n<p>&#8211; I like spending time together, but lately I\u2019ve found it hard to get in touch with you.<br \/>\n&#8211; Response: Oh, so now you\u2019re my mother?<\/p>\n<p>&#8211; I have no desire to be your mother, but I do like to be around people who are accessible. If this doesn\u2019t work for you, I understand. I will find someone who does answer my calls.<\/p>\n<p>It helps me a lot to know when you need me to do the writing on the website. I need a schedule so that I can keep my work in order. I&#8217;m a bit confused about the project itself.<br \/>\n&#8211; Hmm. I guess it\u2019s all about you these days is it? Can&#8217;t you just do what I sent you and let me get my own work done!<\/p>\n<p>&#8211; When it comes to my work, it makes sense for me to have a schedule. My work is important to me and to keep it of high quality, I need better communication and a timeline. If this doesn\u2019t work for your, that is ok. I will find someone who does want to work in this way.<\/p>\n<p>I\u2019m worried about your drinking and would like to talk about it.<br \/>\n&#8211; You had a glass of wine at dinner the other night, so look who\u2019s talking!<\/p>\n<p>&#8211; If you want to talk about my drinking during a different conversion, that is fine with me. Right now, I am talking about your drinking and how it affects me.<\/p>\n<p>I\u2019ve been a coach for parents and partners for ten years now. The situations I work in are often enormous crises. Super clear communication is always the first step to getting the person who is ill in to treatment.<\/p>\n<p>Coaches are not therapists. My job is to help a loved one learn to communicate with someone who has bipolar. This in turn taught me to communicate with anyone. Sometimes, when a conversation or email exchange happens and I feel that someone is trying to control me, my work or to get me to do more work than I have been paid for for example, I will listen, say nothing and LEAVE. They can finish their own work.<\/p>\n<p>My stability is what matters. I pledge not to harm others. I pledge to listen to others when they need to talk to me. I pledge to be the best person I can be. To do this, I don\u2019t have to put up with the crap of others. I can leave.<\/p>\n<p>Julie<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"http:\/\/www.juliefast.com\/family-coaching\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Click here more information on my Coaching for Parents, Family Members and Partners of people with bipolar and schizoaffective disorder.\u00a0<\/a><\/p>\n<!-- AddThis Advanced Settings generic via filter on the_content --><!-- AddThis Share Buttons generic via filter on the_content -->","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p><img aria-describedby=\"caption-attachment-12323\" loading=\"lazy\" class=\"size-medium wp-image-12323\" src=\"https:\/\/www.bipolarhappens.com\/bhblog\/wp-content\/uploads\/30-unbelievable-animal-photos-you-wont-forget-13-258x300.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"258\" height=\"300\" srcset=\"https:\/\/www.bipolarhappens.com\/bhblog\/wp-content\/uploads\/30-unbelievable-animal-photos-you-wont-forget-13-258x300.jpg 258w, https:\/\/www.bipolarhappens.com\/bhblog\/wp-content\/uploads\/30-unbelievable-animal-photos-you-wont-forget-13-129x150.jpg 129w, https:\/\/www.bipolarhappens.com\/bhblog\/wp-content\/uploads\/30-unbelievable-animal-photos-you-wont-forget-13-400x465.jpg 400w, https:\/\/www.bipolarhappens.com\/bhblog\/wp-content\/uploads\/30-unbelievable-animal-photos-you-wont-forget-13.jpg 728w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 258px) 100vw, 258px\" \/><\/p>\n<p id=\"caption-attachment-12323\" class=\"wp-caption-text\">I choose the stable life&#8230;.<\/p>\n<p>Strategies from my parent and partner coaching&#8230;.<\/p>\n<p>When you ask a question or talk about the other person and their answer is about you, learn how to get the conversation back on track by using my Fast Conversation Strategies.<\/p>\n<p>&#8211; I like spending time together, but lately I\u2019ve found it hard to get in touch with you. &#8211; Response: Oh, so now you\u2019re my mother?<\/p>\n<p>&#8211; It helps me a lot to know when you need me to do the writing on the website. I need a schedule so that I can keep my work in order. I&#8217;m a bit confused about the project itself. &#8211; Hmm. I guess it\u2019s all about you these days is it? Can&#8217;t you just do what I sent you and let <a href=\"https:\/\/www.bipolarhappens.com\/bhblog\/fast-conversation-strategies-what-to-say-when-a-person-is-trying-to-control-you\/\">[ Read More ]<\/a><!-- AddThis Advanced Settings generic via filter on get_the_excerpt --><!-- AddThis Share Buttons generic via filter on get_the_excerpt --><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":12323,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_links_to":"","_links_to_target":""},"categories":[],"tags":[136],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.bipolarhappens.com\/bhblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/12578"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.bipolarhappens.com\/bhblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.bipolarhappens.com\/bhblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.bipolarhappens.com\/bhblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.bipolarhappens.com\/bhblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=12578"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/www.bipolarhappens.com\/bhblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/12578\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":12579,"href":"https:\/\/www.bipolarhappens.com\/bhblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/12578\/revisions\/12579"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.bipolarhappens.com\/bhblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/12323"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.bipolarhappens.com\/bhblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=12578"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.bipolarhappens.com\/bhblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=12578"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.bipolarhappens.com\/bhblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=12578"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}